Married 3-5 years · Money · Together today
One of us left home in our first 5 years - and we're still together
We have been married for 3 to 5 years. Ours is a church marriage. We have two children together. We live in Nyanza.
Both spouses' sides
Money problems in marriage: how Kenyan couples built through them
School fees, debts, a spouse who hides income - money is one of the most common reasons Kenyan couples fight. Here is what couples who got through it say helped.
What couples told us
How many named this challenge
43%
Based on 529 responses · updated 13 November 2026 · How we count
What helped most
Show the numbers
| Answer | People | % |
|---|---|---|
| Nothing helped | 52 | 23% |
| Pastor, imam or faith leader | 44 | 19.5% |
| Friends | 37 | 16.4% |
| My family | 32 | 14.2% |
| Professional counsellor | 16 | 7.1% |
| Elders | 14 | 6.2% |
| Mentor or older couple | 13 | 5.8% |
| My spouse's family | 10 | 4.4% |
| Online groups or social media | - | Hidden (fewer than 10) |
| A book, course or seminar | - | Hidden (fewer than 10) |
| No one | 0 | 0% |
| Other | 0 | 0% |
Based on 226 responses · updated 13 November 2026 · How we count
What did not help
Show the numbers
| Answer | People | % |
|---|---|---|
| Silent treatment | 111 | 49.1% |
| Friends or family taking sides | 91 | 40.3% |
| Threatening divorce | 77 | 34.1% |
| Involving too many people | 76 | 33.6% |
| Leaving home | 39 | 17.3% |
| Social media | 37 | 16.4% |
| Revenge | 25 | 11.1% |
| Other | 0 | 0% |
Based on 226 responses · updated 13 November 2026 · How we count
How they built through it
Married 6-10 years · Money · Divorced
Money and finances in year 1 of our marriage: what we learned
We have been married for 6 to 10 years. Ours is a come-we-stay, later formalised marriage. We have one child together. We live in Nairobi.
Married 6-10 years · Money · Together today
Unfaithfulness nearly ended our marriage in year 7. Here's how we built it back
We have been married for 6 to 10 years. Ours is a come-we-stay, later formalised marriage. We have one child together. We live in Coast.
Married under 3 years · Money · Divorced
Job loss or business failure in year 3 of our marriage: what we learned
We have been married for less than 3 years. Ours is a church marriage. We have one child together. We live in Rift Valley.
Married 3-5 years · Money · Together today
We separated 3 times in our first 4 years - and we're still together
We have been married for 3 to 5 years. Ours is a islamic marriage. We have one child together. We live in Central.
Married under 3 years · Money · Divorced
Job loss or business failure in year 3 of our marriage: what we learned
We have been married for less than 3 years. Ours is a church marriage. We have one child together. We live in Rift Valley.
Fight fair on this
- 1Put all the numbers on the table together: income, debts, what goes home to family. Secrets about money hurt more than the shortage.
- 2Agree a budget for the month before it starts, not in the middle of an argument about school fees.
- 3Talk about money at a calm time, never when one of you has just come home tired.
If you are not safe
Being hit, threatened or controlled is not a rough patch - it is abuse, and it is never your fault. Help is free and confidential, for women and men.